Conflicted Views and Vantage Points

a post by Rachel of Lee Meadows Body Care

Dear Reader,

How often do you find yourself in a situation in life asking “why?”  How often do you find yourself paralyzed by fear or guilt or pain?    It’s a familiar state of reality for most of humanity.  We’ve certainly all been there, if we aren’t currently there now. 

I've been working with this individual who had just recently manifested something that they had been looking for, but then out fear, backed away.  I’ve had the privilege of working fairly intimately with this soul over the past month, and have gained something of a birds-eye-view of the big picture in this whole situation.  And I must say that at certain points in in our work together, I found their fear to be terribly frustrating.  To the point where a part of me wanted nothing more than to ask, “Don’t you want to see yourself?  Your true self?  Don’t you want to live true to who you are and experience yourself in all the fullness I know exists inside of you?  Don’t you see that if you take this leap you will land in a much better place than where you are now?  Your higher self is here with me, urging you forward, hoping that you’ll leap.  Don’t you see how the universe is conspiring to raise you up?!” 

And there it was, that last line.  “Don’t you see how the universe is conspiring to raise you up?”  It just clicked inside of me.  How often have my spirit guides rolled their eyes and silently thought the same thing towards me?  Waiting, just as I am now, for the person to make the decision on their own- because it is a decision only they can make.  How often have I, in turn, stood at that point in my path, my fear and self-doubt preventing me from leaping, or taking the next step.  Like little weights around my ankles, making it difficult to lift my feet and place one in front of the other. 

My awareness was suddenly drawn to my own goals and ambitions- to that which I am currently pursuing.   In the situation above, I held a birds-eye-view, and so it seems obvious to me.  But here, in my own life, I stand on my own pinnacle, surely urged on by those who have a vantage point on me, quite probably thinking the exact same things.  “Don’t you see how the universe is conspiring to raise you up?” 

I had to laugh really, as the mental images played out: my soul and spirit guides standing high on a cliff side, watching my human ego and mind, my conscious reality muddle awkwardly around.  Treading slowly and heavily, with feet weighed down by fear and uncertainty, not quite trusting the ground in front of me but still wanting that which lay at the end, eyes seeing mostly fog.  “For someone who is supposedly so smart she sure can be dense.” I imagine them shaking their heads at me, and my reluctance to acknowledge that I was indeed wearing weights around my ankles. 

I have to imagine this is what parents and teachers feel often, as they look at their students and children, seeing potential, knowing the fullness of who that child can be, but having to let them make the decision on their own.  

So now here I am, swallowing my own medicine.  Becoming aware of my ankle weights and making the decision to remove them- one by one.  And as I do, the fog lessens.  I may not see the details of the road before me, but I know the ground is solid, and that the universe is indeed conspiring to lift me up.  So why not walk forward with confidence? 

With much love and gratitude to the student who became my teacher,
Rachel 
A Healing Community Contributer