The No. 1 Secret to Finding Yourself

Hello, lovelies! Today I have a soul-stirring guest post from Leanna and Kevin over at The League of Champions. It’s all about being who you are . . . withoutwaiting for some special thing first. Enjoy and show them some love when you’re done reading! :)
Do you ever feel like…
You have to engineer an irresistible persona to get people to like you?
You can’t unleash the real you until you’re done baking?
You’re a work in progress that will never be complete?
No one hears your voice in a deafeningly loud world?
People say, “Be yourself.”  But what is “yourself?”  Luckily, the solution can be found in one simple secret.
Many of us have this problem of finding ourselves.  You’re not abnormal, or broken, or on the wrong track if you feel this way.  
We’ve all be told, one time or another, that we “should” be something that was different from what we wanted to be.  So then we start to think, “Well, maybe I’m wrong, maybe I should be something different…” and we question ourselves so much, we forget what we really were in the first place.  Or maybe we were told, “That’s just the way things are,” by someone who hadn’t bothered to find out if things could be other ways, too.  So then we began to think we had to accept a reality that we didn’t want.  
It’s because of all the moments you were told not to follow your gut, that your gut was wrong, that you now feel like the real you – who knows all the right answers – is eluding you.
All these moments can be undone, however.  You can get in touch with your true self simply, right now, no waiting.  The biggest secret to finding yourself is… to stop looking.
The real you is not someone who has to be stitched together from pieces of what you think you should be, or someone who’s still being shaped and formed, or that ultimate personality you‘ve come up with in your head.  Of course we continue to grow and change, so think of that as an expansion of the true you.  But the true you is already here.
To stop looking means to stop putting on an act.  Sometimes we act a certain way because we’re around certain people.  Or, even when we’re alone, our choices reflect what we think the outside world will accept.   Doing this is like putting on a mask we think everyone else will like.  To take off the mask, just stop editing yourself.  The true you is already here.  It has always been underneath the mask, because it’s how you’d naturally act if you weren’t pretending.
When you want to say, “I like your sunglasses,” to the good-lookin’ person sitting next to you on the bus (but you stop yourself because they might think you’re repulsive), the real you would just say it.  It’s what you’d inherently do, if you weren’t afraid.  When we edit ourselves, it’s out of fear; fear is what causes us to hide our real faces behind masks.
“Stop looking” also means start trusting your inner joy.  You don’t need to search for that, it comes to you automatically to indicate the things you love.  The things you love are already known to you; the positive response they stimulate is unwavering and naturally there – so your passions and desires lead to the true you.  If given a few options, the choice that makes you feel a surge of excitement is the one that will be aligned with your true self.  You’ll have confirmation that you’ve made the right choice, too – when you’re engaged in the outcome of that decision, you don’t feel like you need to be doing anything else.  Your mind is clear and you aren’t thinking about the past or future, only the present moment.
When you want to run away from your accounting job cubicle and become the dancer you started training to be when you were three, the real you would start pique turning right out of the office.  It’s what you would do if you gave yourself permission to follow your bliss.  We feel so awful sometimes, and it’s just our body is trying to signal to us that we’re acting in ways that aren’t meant to be.
So you can stop looking, because the true you is already here.  Your gut feelings, your fearless instincts, what makes you happy – all of these things are inherent.  You were born with them.  You just stopped trusting them and forgot they were there to guide you to yourself.
“It is our choices… that show who we really are, far more than our abilities.”
-Dumbledore in Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, J.K. Rowling
Choices define who we are, so let your choices reflect your true feelings.  Make the more joyful, fearless choice.  Your positive feelings will indicate which choice that is.  That will be the real you.  Ask yourself, “Am I doing this because I’m afraid?  Or am I acting in a way that will make me the most engaged, the most happy?”  Try giving up fear, for just one day.  You can always go back to being safe and unfulfilled if you want to.
You no longer have to think of yourself as a batch of cookies in the oven, still baking.  You can be the real, complete, whole you right now.  The very moment you start making the choices that reflect your inner joy and your passion, your real self has entered the world.  From the smallest of choices (opting to rock out to your favorite song, instead of sitting there like a lump, to make your commute more enjoyable), to the largest life changes (removing yourself from an energy-sucking workplace to pursue your dream), all your decisions are opportunities to be your real self.  Today, instead of choosing the person you think you should be, choose you.  Your bliss will guide you to where you are.
So stop pretending to be something you’re not, stop with the disclaimers and apologies, and stop hiding behind a false persona, because nobody likes a liar.  People will hear you if you are letting out your uniqueness.  Everyone wants to come alive, so those who haven’t admire the ones who have.
Leave a comment to inspire others with a choice that made you come alive today!
The League of Champions was founded by Leanna Dindal and Kevin Rae, with the mission of empowering people to achieve their own, personal definitions of success.  Developed with artists in mind, The League focuses on unlocking your creativity and finding the inner strength to make your life anything you want it to be.  Leanna and Kevin strive to live as Champions: excellent individuals with lives of independence, boundless creativity, and their own, unique self-expression.  Find out more at

This post has been brought to you by our newest Guest Blogger, Otiti Jasmine Ovuewhorie. I met Otiti while exploring and happened upon Otiti's beautiful blog & it blew me away! I love her style and strength. I love her encouragement and empowerment. I just love HER and I know you will too. Please keep an eye on the guest blogger column, for more inspiring, inspiriting posts from Otiti! You can also follow her on twitter, friend her on FACEBOOK or visit her blog at