Love Letters to Yourself

It's been a practice of mine for many years to write letters for my own emotional healing process. These are letters written that are not actually delivered to the person being addressed. They are written for the pure emotional expression. They help me to say all the things that I need to say, that other people may not be able to hear. There are so many situations in life where it is simply not appropriate to share your true feelings about things. We all know that screaming at your boss when you get passed over for a promotion is not going to help you get the next one, but the screams still live inside. Writing imaginary letters to the person who has triggered your emotions gives you a space to express yourself freely in a completely uncensored way, allowing the healing to take place.

My journal & I were besties for many years. I have written countless letters to people that will never read them. Pouring my heart out & releasing the pain has been a way of life for me. In the beginning, I wrote prolificly. Sharing & sharing & sharing. It helped me to clear my mind & handle situations with a calmness I could not have had if I had to stuff my emotions inside. My notebooks served as my "poor person's therapist," offering me a freedom of expression that I could not have anywhere else in my life, helping me to organize my thoughts & prepare a plan of action, that would no longer involve wanting to set anyone or anything on fire. That journal has saved many lives, but mostly my own.

Now, I only write on occassion, when something happens that stings so badly that I can't see my way clearly through it, which doesn't happen very often. Recently, I was inspired to write a new kind of letter for emotional healing. Instead of writing an undelivered letter TO someone else sharing my feelings, what if I wrote a letter to myself FROM someone else? Then I could "hear" all of the things that I wished this person would say to me. What a new & exciting concept for my own emotional healing!

The circumstance that inspired it was pretty simple. I fell in love with someone who was not in love with me. If that has ever happened to you, you know that it can be pretty heartbreaking. I didn't need to write letters expressing my own feelings, because I was already crystal clear on what I felt. I felt rejected. What I wanted was validation. So I gave it to myself. I wrote a letter to myself (from him) offering me an explanation. I have NO idea what my friend ever felt for me, but reading my letter brought me comfort & closure. Had we actually talked about it, he probably would have delivered his own version of the standard spiel about how I am a great person & how I will find my own special someone some day and I would have heard "Blah. Blah. Blah.... blahdeedee blah deedee blah dee blah blah." His voice would have been like the adult voices in Charlie Brown cartoons, no actual words, just a bunch of gravelly background noise. I would have kept replaying the scene in my mind, wishing he would have said what I really wanted to hear. With my new letter writing technique, now he did. LOL

It's so amazing when someone says all the right things to us to make us feel whole & complete, but that doesn't always happen. Ultimately, all healing comes from within. No matter what anyone around us says or does, we can only find healing within ourselves. By writing letters to yourself, you are taking on the role of "saying all the right things" & giving yourself what other people in your life are not always capable of giving. Whitney Houston may have had some issues, but when she sang about the "Greatest Love of All" she was right on target. Loving yourself is the key to self-mastery.

So, if you need to hear words of support, encouragement or healing, try writing yourself a "Love Letter." Let it say EVERYTHING you need to hear. Tell yourself how amazing & wonderful & fabulous you are. Then read it & re-read it, allowing those words to soak into your soul. You are amazing & wonderful & fabulous! You know the words you need to hear better than anyone else ever will. So say them to yourself. Be your own best friend and let the healing begin.

This story was brought to you by Deborah Lighthart, Psychic Advisor, Healer & Visionary Artist. The name "Deborah" means "Bee seeking the honey of life." Deborah's life mission is to help you find a sweet, satisfying & soulful existence. Her private practice is located at Feronia Wellness Center in Germantown WI, but she also works by phone & online. Her psychic readings are uplifting, accurate & insightful. Her healing work is soothing, spiritual & transformational. Her artwork is modern, abstract & spirited. She is also the Founder of Feronia Wellness Organization, a non-profit group promoting holistic health & wellness. Deborah believes that health & happiness are your birthright and she works in every way possible to help you claim it. You can find more information about Deborah at